


A Certain Kind of Sadness

by George_Benji



Series: Bad Things Happen [7]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bittersweet, Bittersweet Ending, Fake AH Crew, Knives, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:27:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21844423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/George_Benji/pseuds/George_Benji
Summary: How the four met each other.-You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness.-Alfredo fell in love with being alone.-Jeremy has wasted his whole life.-Trevor craved something.
Relationships: Alfredo Diaz/Jeremy Dooley, Alfredo Diaz/Ryan Haywood, Jeremy Dooley/Ryan Haywood, Trevor Collins/Alfredo Diaz, Trevor Collins/Alfredo Diaz/Jeremy Dooley/Ryan Haywood, Trevor Collins/Jeremy Dooley, Trevor Collins/Ryan Haywood
Series: Bad Things Happen [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1562848
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	1. Addiction

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness… a certain  _ loneliness. _ It fills your lungs and keeps you from ever feeling whole or happy ever again. You feel like you'll die without it.

This addiction is what pushes Ryan from other people. It's why he's a vagabond. No crew. No family. No friends. No connections. Most importantly? No happiness.

He works by himself. He waits for the day he dies. He never works with the same person twice.

Until…

Until he  _ does _ .

The Vagabond runs a quick job, in and out of a warehouse, 5 dead behind him. He runs this job with a little bald man in a garish costume going by Rimmy Tim.

The job goes so well that Rimmy Tim and the Vagabond run  _ another  _ job together. Ryan doesn't understand why but he feels something he's never felt before when Rimmy tells him it's nice to see a familiar face. He  _ likes _ what he feels and that's not okay.

They keep running jobs together. They've known each other for months now. Rimmy Tim invites the Vagabond out to a club, and Ryan doesn't do clubs but Rimmy says his whole crew will be there.

Hanging out at the club is  _ fun _ . Jeremy and Ryan learn each other's names and Ryan knows now what it feels like to have a friend. The Kingpin, Geoff, hires Ryan that night. Ryan smiles in bed and he can't help but wonder how he ever got so into his own pain. What he's feeling right now… he'd do anything to protect it.

Ryan runs jobs with more than just Jeremy. His favorite is when he, Jeremy and Alfredo all go together. They're unstoppable. Especially if Trevor did the planning.

The four of them go out for drinks and Ryan promises himself that he'd risk his life to save any of them.

He says this to them when he's drunk enough.

Alfredo presses a kiss into his cheek and then Trevor drops him off at his house. He makes Jeremy spend the night.

Ryan wakes up with a smile on his face, Jeremy laying on top of him. They go out for breakfast together and Alfredo says it first…

"I've fallen in love with you guys."

Ryan smiles and holds Alfredo's hand.

"I feel like I've wasted my life until I met you all." Jeremy grabs their hands.

"This sounds so dumb but I crave you all every second we're appart." Trevor grips their hands.

"I've become addicted to you all."


	2. Fallen

Alfredo fell in love with being alone. There was nothing he loved more than sitting on top of a roof by himself, only his sniper and the feeling of something apocalyptic to keep him company.

He always felt like soulmates were real. But after a certain point he just decided that his didn't exist. He was  _ in love _ with the idea of spending the rest of his life alone. 

Though… he was always amazing at lying to himself.

He's a remarkable marksman. He tells men that if can shoot a dime the toss into the air that he'll sleep with them. He never misses, but everyone knows he'd sleep with them even if he did.

Alfredo becomes the kind of man who ruins crews overnight. All he has to do kill half a dozen and blow the other half. It's amazing how quickly you can ruin someone's life by blowing all of their friends. Alfredo ruins a lot of lives.

When he feels like he's compensating for not having the soul mate he was certain he would have, he reminds himself that he's in love with the loneliness that follows him.

He reminds himself this when he meets Trevor Collins.

Trevor walks into the club Alfredo's gambling high roller at and walks out with Alfredo, a man 50k dollars richer, on his arm. Alfredo tells Trevor about his dime trick. Trevor tells him he'd rather know him long enough to get dinner the next day. Alfredo never shows Trevor his dime trick.

Somehow Alfredo gets invited to run a job for Trevor. He runs it with some guys going by Golden Boy and Axial. All three of them are snipers and Alfredo is exponentially better than either of them. Alfredo gets invited on more jobs.

He quickly falls in love with the jobs he runs with Jeremy and Ryan. The three of them work perfectly in sync. No holes. Trevor meticulously plans all of their jobs. 

Alfredo can't believe he ever gave up hope of finding his soulmates.

The four of them go everywhere together. Clubs, jobs, grocery shopping, home. Alfredo's ideal morning is giving each of them a kiss to wake them up. Unfortunately Alfredo sleeps in the longest most of the time.


	3. Wasted

Jeremy has wasted his whole life. He's never once looked back on anything with any pride or contentment. It's either apathy or the drive to finally do  _ something. _

This drive has led him to push away every friend, every job, every single little thing that could possibly satisfy him. He jumps for shitty job to shitty job until he falls into a particularly shitty freelance gig. This particular shitty freelance gig is under the table and quite possibly less than legal.

It’s actually so quite possibly not legal that it is, in fact, organized gang activity. 

Despite feeling like nothing mattered, he decided to stick with crime. He kept going, building a name for himself. Even if he were to die in a dirty ditch somewhere, and his life would really amount to nothing… he was going to have while he got there.

He runs jobs and starts going for hire, eventually getting hired by a Kingpin for a crew that was really well known. He meets this crew and he clicks instantly. He has jokes he makes with them and he’s not sure when but he starts to trust them. 

And then he goes on a job with the Vagabond and he… His whole life changes. 

The Vagabond tells him that it was the best job he’d ever been on and Jeremy is certain how or why but he knows that it’s true.

They run more jobs together.

They find that while they work perfectly, they still have holes. They need someone to help with planning and someone for callouts. They add Alfredo and Trevor to their group. It’s instant. They’re unstoppable. It’s mechanical.

And then one day on a job, Jeremy gets shot. No one knows what’s going to happen. The Vagabond carries him back to the penthouse. Jeremy tells him that if he dies there he’s happy he wasted his life with their crew. The Vagabond tells him to call him Ryan.

Jeremy lives, because of course he does. 

He goes out with Ryan, Trevor and Alfredo and he finds out that life can be more than just cheap thrills. He finds that his life was never wasting away, it was leading him to these guys.


	4. Craved

Trevor craved something.

He felt empty and cold and broken and not  _ complete. _ He filled himself with party drugs, and then when he still felt that  _ ache _ he switched to power. He became a businessman and the longing for something led him to controlling a gang.

Nothing was  _ satisfying _ .

Not the money. Not the power. Not the sweet, hellishly euphoric feeling of pressing a knife into someone's throat and dragging it as slowly as he could across. So he kept searching for what might stave off the feeling of restlessness he’d been feeling his whole life.

He starts hook ups. He goes to a club, goes to some else's house, and then leaves before the sunrises. He feels even colder, and even more broken than he had before. 

And then he meets Alfredo Diaz.

He walks into a club, and flirts just as he would any other night, and he leaves with Alfredo. Trevor’s not sure what it is about Alfredo, but he doesn’t sleep with him. Instead he sleeps on Alfredo’s couch and they go out for breakfast the next morning. Then dinner. And then… Trevor’s certain that this man can’t leave his life so he invites him to work with his crew.

Trevor feels just a little less broken, and a little less lonely and a little less cold those nights. 

He takes the new hire, Rimmy Tim, Jeremy Dooley… whatever… out for dinner one night. He wants to get to know the guy and somehow the dinner goes not quite how professional as Trevor had hoped it would. He falls in love.

And he keeps falling. He keeps filling the void he’d been aching with. 

Ryan perfectly fills the final bit Trevor was missing. 

  
Trevor can’t remember what it feels like to crave something you don’t know. He’s left it behind and  _ broken _ isn’t something he’d ever connect with again.

**Author's Note:**

> hey thanks for reading. find me on tumblr at georgebenji & mlmfahc


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